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Improve Your Sjogren's Fatigue with Boundary Setting

Writer's picture: Paloma MiquelPaloma Miquel

Updated: Oct 8, 2024

If you struggle with Sjögren's fatigue and find yourself giving away too much of your energy, then read on. Because in this article we’re going to walk you through three practical ways in which you can start taking back control of your energy, improve fatigue with Sjogren's and increase your quality of life through setting boundaries.


The Sjögren's 'Cycle of Fatigue'


Managing your energy levels with Sjögren's can be a real challenge. And many people with Sjögren’s often find themselves pushing themselves to do more than their body can currently handle, despite knowing that they will end up more tired and exhausted the day after.


This also often leads to worsened symptoms more generally, including full-blown flare-ups, keeping you in a frustrating cycle of suffering.


And it’s this repetitive 'cycle of fatigue' that we would like to help you break.




Woman with Sjögren's looking tired and stressed
Sjögren's can lead to a 'cycle of fatigue' that is hard to break


Setting Boundaries to Break The Cycle and Improve Fatigue with Sjogren's


Setting boundaries is a great way to help you prioritise self-care and manage your energy, which is essential to prevent flare-ups, and reduce stress and anxiety.

Boundaries are personal rules that you set for yourself to protect your limited energy levels.


→ They help you decide how much energy you want to use for different things in your life.

→ They help ensure that you have enough energy 'in the tank' for taking care of yourself and avoiding exhaustion


So, pre-defining these rules will help you keep your energy balanced, prevent feeling worn out and making sure the most important things to you are getting the focus they need (while de-prioritising those things which are an unnecessary energy suck).


For example, you might tell a friend before meeting up with them, “if my energy levels run low, I will have to leave early. I hope you understand”.


By establishing clear limits and communicating them effectively, you can maintain a more balanced life, improve your overall well-being, and have healthier relationships.


It is also a great way to prevent you from pushing yourself beyond your limits or capacity, so you don’t overexert yourself and end up giving too much.

On the other hand, not having boundaries is like leaving your house wide open for anyone to come in and take anything and everything. Over time, you’ll end up with nothing!



How to Overcome Challenges to Sticking to Your Boundaries


Despite how useful setting boundaries can be for helping you manage your energy and your symptoms, there are a few challenges that can stop you from applying them successfully. Here, we break these down together with how to overcome them. Let’s dive in.


Challenge #1: Feeling like setting boundaries is ‘selfish’

One of the main obstacles in setting boundaries is the belief that it is selfish. We are here to tell you that this is not true, and in fact, setting boundaries can be a very self-less act!


You might have heard the saying ‘you cannot pour from an empty cup’ - and nowhere is this more relevant than here.


Filling your cup first (i.e. making sure you prioritise your needs where possible) makes sure that you have the energy and capacity to support and care for others as well. You wouldn’t be able to do this unless you fill your cup first.

So to overcome this obstacle, remind yourself of this phrase as regularly as you need to: “You cannot pour from an empty cup, so fill your cup first”. It should become second nature for you to think this way.


Challenge #2: Always putting others’ needs over your own

Now, before I go further, let me clarify that this is not about those who have to take care of others, for example, parents or carers. Of course you have to sometimes prioritise others’ needs over your own, but even then, whenever possible, getting additional help from time to time could be worthwhile to help make sure that you can continue to be there for them.


Who I’m really referring to here is those who feel they are less deserving than others. Less deserving to be happy, less deserving to be healthy, less deserving of enjoying life, less deserving in general.


This mindset is quite common and can be a problem because when you feel you are less deserving, you will be more likely to put other people’s needs over your own, even when you don’t need to, and even when you shouldn’t.


If you never prioritise yourself then you wont have boundaries, and you’ll end up over-stretching yourself. You’ll give too much and end up absolutely exhausted, which can cause Sjögren’s symptoms to worsen. Ironically, this can make you feel resentful towards those you are giving of yourself to, which is the opposite of your intention when giving to others.


A powerful way to overcome this second obstacle is to practice a daily affirmation ritual where you place your hands on your heart and tell yourself, quietly or out loud,


I am worthy of healing. I deserve to be free from suffering just as others deserve to be free from suffering. I deserve to prioritise myself while I heal’.

You’ll be amazed at how powerful these affirmations can be in helping you prioritise yourself and respect the boundaries you set for yourself.



Challenge #3: Not knowing how to set boundaries

The third and final obstacle you may be experiencing when setting boundaries is that you simply don’t know how to do it.

It is actually very rare that we are taught how to set boundaries, and this is something that most of us have to learn, sometimes even very late in life. So we feel intimidated by the idea of setting boundaries.

And a really effective way to overcome this obstacle is to ask a close friend or relative if you can practise boundary setting with them.

What this means is that you’ll simply practice setting boundaries with them that you're afraid to set with other people. So as a first step, you can do this by setting a small boundary such as ‘I need to reschedule our meeting or ‘I won’t be able to stay for long’.




Get your free boundary setting guide


Setting boundaries can be scary at first, and if you’re not used to doing it, it might feel like you’re being selfish or that you don’t deserve to put yourself first.

And because we know that setting and sticking to your boundaries is a struggle that many of you experience, we have put together a free downloadable guide where we’ve summarized the points of this article and also provide a decision making assistant to help you prioritise what you’re putting your energy into.



With practice and a little determination you can set boundaries that protect your time and energy, helping you to have more energy to heal, and to be there for others in the long term.




How we help our clients improve their energy


As everyone with Sjögren's knows, fatigue levels are not just related to one factor: it is the result of many factors coming together to create a perfect storm.


At Beyond Sjögren's we take a holistic approach to helping our clients improve their energy levels including assessing and addressing root causes, helping them through diet and supplementation, supporting them with sleep and stress management, as well as helping them with boundary setting, and much more.


Because of this approach, 90% of our clients who take part in our programmes see significant improvements to their quality of life, and the great majority


Book a free consultation to discuss the best next steps you can take to start feeling better, and with more energy!





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* Nutritional therapies work alongside, and do not replace, standard medical care. Outcomes inevitably vary between individuals.

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